you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
