So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
