Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
