Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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