you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
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