Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Randomize
