O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
