just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
