dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
Randomize
