I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
