Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
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