I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
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