No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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