They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
