We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
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