does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
