I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Randomize
