that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
