How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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