Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
