he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
She bit a glass in half.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Randomize
