There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize
