It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
