And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Randomize