Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
Two words: blizzard sex
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
