Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
