i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Randomize
