just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.�
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
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