Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize
