Dude, I was completely sober last night, didn't puke on my shoes, went home with an incredibly beautiful girl, wore a condom, and didn't wake up in a puddle of urine this morning.
hah, sarcasm, classic
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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