Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
