I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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