I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
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