Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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