very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
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