i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
My day in three words: secret purse cake
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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