put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
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