Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
