glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
