i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
porn star boner night. come get it.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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