hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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