so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
