She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
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