She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
