Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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