We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize
