He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Who died my cat blue again?
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
