watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
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