It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
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