Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Randomize
